October 14th, 2005


Things In Common With Heisenberg...

So, it's now the middle of the month of October and I have been back in the States for about a month. I still do not have a firm answer on my future with my shop. They have refused to actually tell me even what my schedule is. I asked the NCOIC if I were going to be on swings permanently and she said, "Yes, but that could change tomorrow." I have been slated to do web programming, power point slide briefings, dorm management and Unit Deployment Manager duties. I thought that I had finally been decided upon at the beginning of this week when I went to work on Tuesday and had the NCOIC look at me when I walked in and say, "You're going to do web stuff. That's your job. So tell me the project ideas you have."

Now, we have two NCOIC's basically, though one is sort of powerless and in a state of flux, much like me. He just blinked and had no idea where that had come from. While we were tossing this back and forth, trying to figure out if what NCOIC 1 had been told was true or if it was actually NCOIC 2 who had the correct information I received other news from my supervisor. She pulled me into her office and told me that the commander really didn't want to keep me in the Air Force. As a result of that, I had a meeting with the squadron superintendent today in order to discuss my future with the unit.

In my meeting with the superintendent I simply told him the simple truth of my entire Air Force career up to this point. I explained what had happened and how I felt about my current situation. In the end he said that now he had a better idea of me and who I was, and so he was willing to recommend to the commander that I be allowed to serve out the rest of my enlistment without further actions. He then informed me that it would be on me to actually convince her that I was worth keeping in the Air Force. The problem with that is that it means getting my actual shop to commit to allowing me to do something productive so that I can use that as a starting point to show how much I have to offer. It also means, "Being an active member of the squadron, doing more than we expect of other people."

What the squadron currently expects of people is about one hundred percent of your life, and I can't give that. I just do not feel that strongly about the Air Force anymore. This puts me in the position of wondering about this discharge. How long will it take? Will it affect my ability to get a job when I'm out? Will I get severance pay? (There is an Air Force rule about severance pay for 10 year + personnel processed out, just not sure if this qualifies) Really, I just think that if I can get processed out and it not leave me in a financial bind, that might just be the best way to go. There are just too many uncertainties in all of this...
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